Until now . i am still having that restless mind ...and uneasy feel within me (really suck to the core !) Life is full of surprises ...i'm not expecting any reply from "R" anymore ...but he reply !!
I'm expecting C(ro-g) to call me ...but she didn't !!What a irony in life , don't you agree ...i also cannot beleive this type of thing can happen wor
in fact received 3 sms from "R" -- > REALLY SURPRISE !!
"Yes Eric ? Just send me sms ok. What's up ? "
"I will let you know , if i can get leave on that day ok. How have you been doing so far ? Makan already ?"
"Relax. Calm down Eric ! What's bothering you anyway. Work ? "
At least got communicate , not bad ...maybe this friendship got hope de..wait 2 weeks time see how
I send 5 sms and make 5 seperate calls to C(ro-g) -> NO CALL /NO SMS
--> REALLY SURPRISE !!
.... Don't know what to say about this ...anyway , my patient deadline is until Monday 12 mid -night. At least give her time to coll down and consider about our friendship...if by then really BREAK ...alos no more regret lah
This is my sms send in the evening :
"C(ro-g) ,sorry for all today's miss calls from me (confirm no more call again) tomorrow also will send last sms to u after deliver book 2 to your house. If by next monday 12 mid night i still do not receive any "thank you" call/sms -confirm 100% break relationship. If you want pay back $xx. u can contact me by monday. I do not want to keep this friendship anymore if you do not value it. No meaning to continue if u take me for granted. BREAK OR FRIEND ?U decide ! I will not feel guilty or regret anything. U owe me a agreement yet to settle ~ can u live in peace ? Its your call now . "
Until now i update this blog..i still DO NOT get any response ...i believe the answer is very clear now ..lol ...nevermind lah, wait ntil Monday mid night see how loh
Tuesday morning then make official announcement loh (if applicable)
If anyone simply just make use of you for their needs/wants only ...i don't think this type of friends is worth to keep... Morever , what do you think of anyone who can "BETRAY" you to wait 2 hours just for nothing...If its friends will not treat you this way de... TRUE Friends do not hurt you , instead they help you ! I believe you agree this too !!
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
My mood is still lousy..
Last nite while watching internet movie , semone from RO-G (Jrxx) msn me , i just reply him "busy" ..then ignore his msn and continue to watch the movie.
So after that , i put benson to sleep then come back to the computer and check Jrxx 's msn and i read one of the satement he make and make it BOLD in RED -- YOU ARE DEAD ..wtf !!
Is this a joke or ???
I do not have any nice mood to entertain such prank joke or what-so-ever at the moment...then i reply his msn asking him to explain. He apologise saying that his friend come to his house and he was showing him that msn can actually change font and colour...so he use this statement to show to him...i don't think "You are DEAD" is something nice to use as a demo example especially sending to someone who's having deep shity mood whole day due to unhappiness happening.
Since he explain and apologise , i rest this case
The bad & uneasy feeling keep haunting me ...and its driving me crazy...maybe i should make a trip to temple for some prayers in order to calm my corrupted mind + give me inner peace ? Maybe it will just help...
I only hope currently i got good friends with me so that i can share out all my feelings ...to say out will help lower sme burden...but the problem is ...where are my friends ? Who is willing to lisetn to me now ...??
So after that , i put benson to sleep then come back to the computer and check Jrxx 's msn and i read one of the satement he make and make it BOLD in RED -- YOU ARE DEAD ..wtf !!
Is this a joke or ???
I do not have any nice mood to entertain such prank joke or what-so-ever at the moment...then i reply his msn asking him to explain. He apologise saying that his friend come to his house and he was showing him that msn can actually change font and colour...so he use this statement to show to him...i don't think "You are DEAD" is something nice to use as a demo example especially sending to someone who's having deep shity mood whole day due to unhappiness happening.
Since he explain and apologise , i rest this case
The bad & uneasy feeling keep haunting me ...and its driving me crazy...maybe i should make a trip to temple for some prayers in order to calm my corrupted mind + give me inner peace ? Maybe it will just help...
I only hope currently i got good friends with me so that i can share out all my feelings ...to say out will help lower sme burden...but the problem is ...where are my friends ? Who is willing to lisetn to me now ...??
Some little thoughts...
First thing First , i've a bad feeling that RO-G forum may not survive..somehow i've lost interest to it..From what i talk to Hatori , some Mods and members...it doesn't sound to good of a bright future propects for this forum. The dateline for another year renewal due somewhere in Nov month , and that means another SGD$3xx (cannot remember exact cost)
It's a bad feeling from within myself that's all regards RO-G. what make me feel un-secure is my RO Museum archive - these are my effort , my blood and soul during my active RO times ~ those memories. I doesn't feel good about this. IF RO-G can continue for few years...RO museum can still be there (forget about the previous old RO-G set up by ken)..but if RO-G closed for whatever reason.. the msueum is gone 1 i did not archive it to my PC !
When i've great interest and support active during RO-G set up , i may consider to pay the cost for another year to come ...but not now ...don't know why suddenly my moods change so much nowsaday. ITs certainly very un-healthy
Currently some idea come into my mind...maybe i will set up another blog just to host this RO 's once popular Musem in the early days..another blog hosting is free and i can just use it as a archive there...should be a great idea. I will start working on this migration project as soon as i can fork out some free time in the days to come (stay tuned !)
2nd thought suddenly flash into my mind...about the real meaning of friendship . What vlaue does it have ? Why people cannot keep their words , their promises and betray the basic trust ??
Currently , i have friends who "SABO" and hurt me in different ways that make me feel very emo and menatlly sad + tired..i'm really sick of living such a NOOB lifestyle !
I'm currenly montoring 2 of my friends to see if i were to maintain or totally cut of the friendship network. (yeah, one of them is "R" - depend if he can return $600 two weeks later..and the other is xxx ..to be shared later). I also do not have good feeling towards this 2 friendship , simply have the gut feeling that they take me for granted ~ make use of me to meet their wants/needs and do not really care for the value of our friendship. No wonder is always me calling them !! If heu care or bother ...why not they take initiative to call me too ? Closed Friendship should be a 2-way commnications instead of is me always calling to "DISTURB" ??
Well. i don't want to give up any friendship so easily. Would like to give them a last chance to proof their value towards me..if by my setr dateline ,things are not improving ~ i will make a FINAL decision to STOP all contact once and for all (no point dragging on..no meaning). I will not regret by then cuz i've try my best to keep the friendship going ...but the other party just doesn't appreciate anything ...so there is no meanng to cheat one self ..it takes 2 hands to clap.. Just my lonely efort will not help if the other party is no longer willing to accept me as friends anymore..then just be it - CUT CONTACT, FORGIVE & FORGET ...life goes on.
It is really frustrating whenever i thought of such issues...really hate these type of un-easy feeling ! Hope to quickly settle them and get over it soon !!
It's a bad feeling from within myself that's all regards RO-G. what make me feel un-secure is my RO Museum archive - these are my effort , my blood and soul during my active RO times ~ those memories. I doesn't feel good about this. IF RO-G can continue for few years...RO museum can still be there (forget about the previous old RO-G set up by ken)..but if RO-G closed for whatever reason.. the msueum is gone 1 i did not archive it to my PC !
When i've great interest and support active during RO-G set up , i may consider to pay the cost for another year to come ...but not now ...don't know why suddenly my moods change so much nowsaday. ITs certainly very un-healthy
Currently some idea come into my mind...maybe i will set up another blog just to host this RO 's once popular Musem in the early days..another blog hosting is free and i can just use it as a archive there...should be a great idea. I will start working on this migration project as soon as i can fork out some free time in the days to come (stay tuned !)
2nd thought suddenly flash into my mind...about the real meaning of friendship . What vlaue does it have ? Why people cannot keep their words , their promises and betray the basic trust ??
Currently , i have friends who "SABO" and hurt me in different ways that make me feel very emo and menatlly sad + tired..i'm really sick of living such a NOOB lifestyle !
I'm currenly montoring 2 of my friends to see if i were to maintain or totally cut of the friendship network. (yeah, one of them is "R" - depend if he can return $600 two weeks later..and the other is xxx ..to be shared later). I also do not have good feeling towards this 2 friendship , simply have the gut feeling that they take me for granted ~ make use of me to meet their wants/needs and do not really care for the value of our friendship. No wonder is always me calling them !! If heu care or bother ...why not they take initiative to call me too ? Closed Friendship should be a 2-way commnications instead of is me always calling to "DISTURB" ??
Well. i don't want to give up any friendship so easily. Would like to give them a last chance to proof their value towards me..if by my setr dateline ,things are not improving ~ i will make a FINAL decision to STOP all contact once and for all (no point dragging on..no meaning). I will not regret by then cuz i've try my best to keep the friendship going ...but the other party just doesn't appreciate anything ...so there is no meanng to cheat one self ..it takes 2 hands to clap.. Just my lonely efort will not help if the other party is no longer willing to accept me as friends anymore..then just be it - CUT CONTACT, FORGIVE & FORGET ...life goes on.
It is really frustrating whenever i thought of such issues...really hate these type of un-easy feeling ! Hope to quickly settle them and get over it soon !!
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
A special gift
I was rude and calculative towards c(ro-g). I have realise my mistake now for havving such a noob attitude. As part of my apology , here's the special gift for you ...Saiyuki Reload Manga (book 2 , english version)I went to few places then manage to get this book 2. wonderng why book 2 so short of stock ? Anyway, my effort does pay when i finally found it !! Yeah , mission achieved !
This is the book 2 that you miss out in your collecton from 1-6 . I hope we can meet up soon to hand this manag gift over to you for your pleasure reading
"Whatever i do , i do it for you !"
How about you, ask yourself do you value our friendship ?
A surprise SMS
Did not expect "R" to sms or return anymore $ (in fact , had given up hope for this friendship already)
I go out of the house to go fetch Benson , But i forgot to bring my hp out. Nevermind lah , not expecting any important call , so its okay
suddenly...when i return back home , i was surprise to see a msg from "R". I really never expect him to response anymore ..
"Hello Eric..sorry to tell you that i'm working today and we are not able to meet . Bad news I lost my wallet last few days , I am telling you the truth Eric ! I need to replace m new IC , lost $40 , POSB atm card and others too. I need you to giveme another 2 more weeks to pay your $600 , is it ok ? Hope you are doing fine with your family. Take care of yourself..."
This is my reply back :
Ok ,shall we meet on XXX for a simple dinner then you can pass to me cash $600 , is it ok for you , "R" ?
So it is set another new date , to settle the $ 2 weeks later...Will "R" pay back as what he promise this time ? or is it just another "Time delay for you to forget" old trick? Lets cross our finger...and see what happen next.
I go out of the house to go fetch Benson , But i forgot to bring my hp out. Nevermind lah , not expecting any important call , so its okay
suddenly...when i return back home , i was surprise to see a msg from "R". I really never expect him to response anymore ..
"Hello Eric..sorry to tell you that i'm working today and we are not able to meet . Bad news I lost my wallet last few days , I am telling you the truth Eric ! I need to replace m new IC , lost $40 , POSB atm card and others too. I need you to giveme another 2 more weeks to pay your $600 , is it ok ? Hope you are doing fine with your family. Take care of yourself..."
This is my reply back :
Ok ,shall we meet on XXX for a simple dinner then you can pass to me cash $600 , is it ok for you , "R" ?
So it is set another new date , to settle the $ 2 weeks later...Will "R" pay back as what he promise this time ? or is it just another "Time delay for you to forget" old trick? Lets cross our finger...and see what happen next.
i have learned "how NOT to be STUPID"
Send Benson to nursery , was late for 1-2 minutes and the door is close. Another parent also bring her boy there...so when the teacher open the door , only saw me and let benson go in. She did not saw the other parent and boy ..then close the door knocking into the boy's head lightly !!
Wow ...the Malay teacher qickly apologise to that mother , lol
Lucky her boy was not badly hurt .
Then receive a call from Gary ~ ask to go out for a cup of ice barkley (he exlain weather is hot and heaty , drink barkley is good)..okay , i got some time and he come Yishun fetch me and we go woodlands (Vista Point) coffee shop for some drink and chit chat.
Then he send me back to Sembawang.
I have send a reminder to "R" ask him to settle the $ , if he still sincere to do so by today. Otherwise , tomorrow he will receive a FINAL msg from me , to break off the friendship ~ this type of friend throw is better...cannot be trusted at all !! (just forget it)
As for "C" , after being played out by her waitng 2 hours for nothing...i have been thinking of this friendship too. KEEP or THROW ??
I decide to KEEP and be patience with her ...(maybe i more patient with lady ? hehe..)
I stil value her friendship ,despite what she had done to me (fly aeroplane ?)
Never mind ~ forgive and forget loh ` but next time meet up , i have to be more careful so that will not wasted anymore time waiting for nothing
What i have learned..
I have learned not to anyhow take out $$ to help anymore..For beng kind or whatever nonsence reasons ... it doesn't pay.
Sorry to say that if there is nothing beneficial (or nothing to gain) to myself , i will never do it anymore ..WHATEVER agreement/promise , need to settle & deal on the spot - TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT !! (cannot depend on TRUST anymore) Otherwise in the end the one get hurt always end up myself ...help others but never help myself , so stupid !Finally Eric had grow and wake up , at last ~
Wow ...the Malay teacher qickly apologise to that mother , lol
Lucky her boy was not badly hurt .
Then receive a call from Gary ~ ask to go out for a cup of ice barkley (he exlain weather is hot and heaty , drink barkley is good)..okay , i got some time and he come Yishun fetch me and we go woodlands (Vista Point) coffee shop for some drink and chit chat.
Then he send me back to Sembawang.
I have send a reminder to "R" ask him to settle the $ , if he still sincere to do so by today. Otherwise , tomorrow he will receive a FINAL msg from me , to break off the friendship ~ this type of friend throw is better...cannot be trusted at all !! (just forget it)
As for "C" , after being played out by her waitng 2 hours for nothing...i have been thinking of this friendship too. KEEP or THROW ??
I decide to KEEP and be patience with her ...(maybe i more patient with lady ? hehe..)
I stil value her friendship ,despite what she had done to me (fly aeroplane ?)
Never mind ~ forgive and forget loh ` but next time meet up , i have to be more careful so that will not wasted anymore time waiting for nothing
What i have learned..
I have learned not to anyhow take out $$ to help anymore..For beng kind or whatever nonsence reasons ... it doesn't pay.
Sorry to say that if there is nothing beneficial (or nothing to gain) to myself , i will never do it anymore ..WHATEVER agreement/promise , need to settle & deal on the spot - TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT !! (cannot depend on TRUST anymore) Otherwise in the end the one get hurt always end up myself ...help others but never help myself , so stupid !Finally Eric had grow and wake up , at last ~
I must not be ANGRY
"Eric..You must not be ANGRY...ok ?"
~ I Keep telling myself inside my head...keep repeating ...stay relax , think postive..it is very hard , very emo , mixed feeling inside me ..what had happen ?
2 really bad things happen to me today.......When you kind to people , others always "BULLY" and take advantage of you...talking about true friendship nowsaday.. *sign* hard to find de !
(1)
A friend of mine - "R" , few months ago borrow $1200 to help out his family crisis. I trust him and lend it to him cuz friends should always help each other when in need right ? then beginning of this month ,he agre to pay $600 by 25 march , and $600 next month. So i wait and trust his word since he promise me on this date..end up i'm being Betray by him !! ..."R" totally avoid my call and went disappear !! What about the trust ?? its all bull shit ! ...what kind of friendship is this ??? So sad such a thng can happen,,,i help him , he just run away ..
(2)
Then on same day , suppose to meet another friend - "C" at Sembawang MRT at 2.30pm sharp. We had arrange to meet up and then go for KFC meal. Arrangement had been a week ago.
I was there at 2.15pm , i wait...wait ...then received a sms "on the way" (good , C is coming) after like waiitng for half an hour...C is late ! nvm , as long can come as agree , then still okay.
1 hour passed...1.5 hours passed..."Where are you" another message from C. I reply say wait at control room outside...see noone there...i continue to wait until 2 hours..Where are you , C ?? WHAT happen ?? why make me wait 2 hour , then you also just disappear ??? Call your hp also dun want answer ??? What have i done to derserve this ?? this is a 2nd major blow to me ~~ i almost broke down in emo...so sad , so angry , so hated those friend who broke thier trust and promise ...those who take me for granted ...i am like a stupid fool
NEVER-MIND !!!! Eric , you must stand STRONG , ok . Don't treat yourself too hard (life is already so tough) ...just be HAPPY ..YEAH ~
Why should i feel sad and bad about all these ? Those who broke their promise and trust should feel ashame themselves..
Eric will move on and take this opportunity to learn more about life , about the meaning of friendship. It is a growing experience for me within me . For those who HURT Eric , i Thank you for the life experience you've given to me..i will not balame you// i will live stronger than before .
Eric , you must not CRY , you must not be ANGRY ...everythign happen for a reason , cause & effect . .it's just part of your life ...i will take it as it is
Special Moments...
On the way to work...saw 2 "special" stuffs along the way :
(1)
IT was drizzling outside and weather is cold..saw a middle-age mother pushing a stroller (inside with a baby)...she placed the entire umbralla on top of the stroller to ensure babay is dry...while herself is wet ..Wow , this is indeed a great Mother's LOVE !
(2)
A Indian man was walking towards me along the pavement..(from a far distance ) i notice that he do not have his left arm !! While we walk towards each other , then i start to smile to myself and slightly knock my own head..haha.
the Indain man walk past me , his left arm placed behind his back !!! Oh my eye play trick on me ...from far away is like no arm like that ..lol
Picture Times ...
Nata Fun Packaging with "BIG MOUTH" man ?
KFC fomula..
UFO Ballons attack our Company's office ?
~ in celebration of 30th anniversary
~ I Keep telling myself inside my head...keep repeating ...stay relax , think postive..it is very hard , very emo , mixed feeling inside me ..what had happen ?
2 really bad things happen to me today.......When you kind to people , others always "BULLY" and take advantage of you...talking about true friendship nowsaday.. *sign* hard to find de !
(1)
A friend of mine - "R" , few months ago borrow $1200 to help out his family crisis. I trust him and lend it to him cuz friends should always help each other when in need right ? then beginning of this month ,he agre to pay $600 by 25 march , and $600 next month. So i wait and trust his word since he promise me on this date..end up i'm being Betray by him !! ..."R" totally avoid my call and went disappear !! What about the trust ?? its all bull shit ! ...what kind of friendship is this ??? So sad such a thng can happen,,,i help him , he just run away ..
(2)
Then on same day , suppose to meet another friend - "C" at Sembawang MRT at 2.30pm sharp. We had arrange to meet up and then go for KFC meal. Arrangement had been a week ago.
I was there at 2.15pm , i wait...wait ...then received a sms "on the way" (good , C is coming) after like waiitng for half an hour...C is late ! nvm , as long can come as agree , then still okay.
1 hour passed...1.5 hours passed..."Where are you" another message from C. I reply say wait at control room outside...see noone there...i continue to wait until 2 hours..Where are you , C ?? WHAT happen ?? why make me wait 2 hour , then you also just disappear ??? Call your hp also dun want answer ??? What have i done to derserve this ?? this is a 2nd major blow to me ~~ i almost broke down in emo...so sad , so angry , so hated those friend who broke thier trust and promise ...those who take me for granted ...i am like a stupid fool
NEVER-MIND !!!! Eric , you must stand STRONG , ok . Don't treat yourself too hard (life is already so tough) ...just be HAPPY ..YEAH ~
Why should i feel sad and bad about all these ? Those who broke their promise and trust should feel ashame themselves..
Eric will move on and take this opportunity to learn more about life , about the meaning of friendship. It is a growing experience for me within me . For those who HURT Eric , i Thank you for the life experience you've given to me..i will not balame you// i will live stronger than before .
Eric , you must not CRY , you must not be ANGRY ...everythign happen for a reason , cause & effect . .it's just part of your life ...i will take it as it is
Special Moments...
On the way to work...saw 2 "special" stuffs along the way :
(1)
IT was drizzling outside and weather is cold..saw a middle-age mother pushing a stroller (inside with a baby)...she placed the entire umbralla on top of the stroller to ensure babay is dry...while herself is wet ..Wow , this is indeed a great Mother's LOVE !
(2)
A Indian man was walking towards me along the pavement..(from a far distance ) i notice that he do not have his left arm !! While we walk towards each other , then i start to smile to myself and slightly knock my own head..haha.
the Indain man walk past me , his left arm placed behind his back !!! Oh my eye play trick on me ...from far away is like no arm like that ..lol
Picture Times ...
Nata Fun Packaging with "BIG MOUTH" man ?
KFC fomula..
UFO Ballons attack our Company's office ?
~ in celebration of 30th anniversary
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